Tuesday, December 14, 2010

A video about happiness and sadness


Claire L Hallam said...

Michelle, you don't need to justify yourself to anyone, other than those who are immediately close to you. There comes a point where you need to do what you have to- if you want to explain then fine, but once should be enough for most people beyond family.

Anne said...

I very much want to thank you for being so open and honest and sharing your very difficult situation. I agree with Claire that you have no responsibility whatsoever to justify who you are to anyone. least of all some anonymous entity named "Anne".

Based on what you have shared in this your most recent video it seems that you have accurately identified the major source of your discomfort. Despite the fact that being Michelle brings you comfort, it is causing great distress to your spouse and naturally this causes you significant pain. You are in a very difficult quandary.

You are going go have to come go terms with this. In most cases the marriage is lost. This is part of the very high price of transition. If you can find some way to accommodate Michelle in your life without destroying Bob, that may be your best hope of saving your marriage.

Get yourself AND your wife into counseling. Find professional help. The following is a link to a wife's blog. Maybe you will find something there that will help.



Anonymous said...

Michelle, I think you are marvelous. What you are doing has to be hard. But, your blog must help and you do it so well.

Have you given any thought to being coached for female mannerisms? I think you have a great start, maybe just to polish Michelle.

Anne said...

@ Anonymous...Question: How is "girly" coaching going to help this very troubled individual?

Anonymous said...

Michelle, I agree this is a very difficult place for you to be. I found the few months when I had started transition but could not yet go full time to be a very trying time. For me, there was great liberation in going full time, because that's what I knew I needed.

As Anne says, you have to know what you need most, what is best overall for you. If the need to change sex is very strong, then it will propel you forward. But sometimes the need is something different, something that will allow you to remain with your wife and still be happy. You are the only one who knows. As long as you are aware that there are options, then you can make the choice that is best for you. And I wish you the best.

Francine said...


You are my hero. It seems our lives are full of hard choices that effect others. At the same time, Lives lived to to meet other's expectations are wasted lives. I pray those people who matter to you will begin to understand. keep up your courage.

Anonymous said...

Anne I agree Michelle is troubled. But, why not gain the confidence in the choice she has made.
And it isn't "girly" coaching it is a very serious and responsible plan.

Anne said...

Because perhaps it might be wiser to seriously consider the obviously negative consequences of that choice and to further explore alternatives choices.

Calie said...

Michelle, I have always found bloggers to tell it from the heart. Hearing your voice just tells the story....the honesty, the love of your family, and the frustration.

You and your family are in my thoughts.

Calie xxx

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