Sunday, October 3, 2010

Alone and lonely in a crowd of people

So I knew that my night out was going to be crappy. I just had a really bad feeling and I was really tired even after taking a 2 hour nap. It started out bad because my wife is sick again and really expected me to stay home and take care of her. I did the grocery shopping and cleaned up the kitchen cupboards. I shuffled my daughter back and forth to her friends / volleyball / cheer-leading / friends again. Around 2 o'clock I told my wife I wanted to leave. She got really upset since I was obviously choosing a night out over her. To be fair, she really is sick. She is a very strong person and went to work all week even though she has been sick since Tuesday. She is NOT a needy and whiny person by any means. I managed to leave the house at 2:30 and she called me within 3 minutes crying and telling me that she deserved to be treated better. I didn't even bother to respond and just turned around to go back home. It was still pretty ugly when I got there. I told her to go back to bed and that I would watch the girls until 6. The conversation did not go well and she ended up calling her mother to come out to the house to help her for the night. So once again I left her laying on the couch crying. Michelle has won the battle again? I feel totally drained and can't wait to hit the bed for a little nap. On the drive home I was so upset that I just wanted to get changed right away and be Michelle for the rest of the day. That changed when I sat down on the bed and realized just how tired I was. So I set the alarm for 6 and took a nap.

Still really tired but now focusing on my transformation into Michelle. I was pretty happy with my face but my hair came out sort of funny this time. It still worked but not really happy with it. I was really looking forward to going out because I have a few friends that go out every couple weeks and they were due to make an appearance.

Here are some more pictures from last night. Not really thrilled with any of them. I tried to take some of my face but I just cannot help but look miserable.

Still a lot more to talk about but I need to get cleaned up to go back to see my kids today. I will finish this post later.


dgmoo said...

I'm a mother and a wife. During my 6 years of marriage, there has only been 2 times where I absolutely needed my husband there, not really to take care of me, but more to take care of the child. I think, and maybe it is obvious to you as well, she was trying to get you to react as her loving husband and to pretend that the rest wasn't happening. I really think that you being there for your kids was a positive thing, but the sooner your wife realizes that this is real, the sooner she (and you) will be able to move on. I'm sorry you had a difficult time last night, but they happen, not every weekend can be a good one. I hope this week is better for you!

Claire L Hallam said...

Good to hear that the club is looking out for you (next post). Great photos, I know you may not feel like smiling but you look great and a smile would just make then perfect....naturally I really jealous. Good luck with juggling all the responsibilities!

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