Alone and lonely in a crowd continued.....

My first post this morning seems to have gotten a few reads already. I figure nobody would see if I added more so I will just start a new post now.

So to continue on with my night last night, I had a feeling that it was going to be a bad night and I was not disappointed. It started out ok because an older friend of mine who really likes me showed up. She was with a new friend and left by 11:30. Strike 1. The other girl that kissed me a few weeks ago also showed up and she brought her girlfriend. Strike 2. The night was decent until I realized that four of the people I had talked to were suddenly gone. Strike 3, I'm out of here. I was actually back home and in bed by 1:30. Really a short night for me. This really bothers me because I always make a special effort to find my friends and say goodbye and tell them how much I appreciate their being nice to me. I got extremely depressed because it feels like nobody cares anything about Michelle. Maybe it is just the hormones that are creating all this drama but I started crying at the club. One of the other girls I knew caught me and was really nice. I couldn't really tell her what was wrong because she was having her own guy issues and was also not having a very good night. I feel so pathetic because I never go to the club "with" anybody. None of these people are real friends. How is it that I am so alone and lonely in a crowd of people?

Kind of changing the subject a bit but I found out last night that a guy has been banned from the club because of me and a couple other people last Saturday. Last week, I was outside talking with one of my friends who had brought 2 new girls with her to the club. We were with another 2 girls who are always at the club and we were all talking. Then this guy comes up and starts talking to all of us. Just silly stuff but he managed to talk to each of us within about 3 minutes. Suddenly he turns to my other friend and says "this place is crazy. You can't tell the guys from the girls. I just realized I was talking to a guy!" (me). I asked my friend Caroline if she heard it and said I was done with this guy and was leaving. She said that she would slap him for me. Well it turns out that he also starting bashing on a couple of gay people at the club and they are just as well known as I am by the people running the place. They kicked him out and told him not to come back. I was surprised because I had 3 people ask me if I was ok after last week's "encounter" with this person. They were all concerned and told not to let it bother me. To be honest, I had not given it much thought but it is really nice to know that I do have people who will stand up for me.

Maybe there really are some real friends here after all?????