So things didn't go as bad as we thought they would. The girls are still not sure how to handle it but we need to give them a few days to let it sink in. My oldest is really quiet and not really talking to me. She says that this is something that will lose them their friends and they will be hurt by this. She is genuinely afraid for herself and her sisters. My middle daughter is not happy at all about it. She says she will never want to see me as Michelle. The whole idea is somehow disgusting to her. She is not really disgusted with me but she says that it is gross to her and she does not understand how anyone could try to change their gender. She is the one that scares me because I am deathly afraid that she may have some of the same feelings about being a girl. She is very much a tomboy / jock and I wonder if she just might have some of these same feelings. My youngest was the biggest shock of all. She started crying and ran off twice during our discussion. She kept crying and finally told me that she was upset because she and the girls are always telling me to cut my hair and now she feels bad about it. She also said that she is upset because "daddy can't be who he wants to be". She really surprised both of us.
Now my big question is: "what do I do now?" My wife says that things need to go slow with the girls. I am not going to force them to see me as Michelle. I am running into a wall right now. My friend at work tells me that she is sick of my issues. She says I cry all the time and I am more miserable than I was when there was no Michelle. She does not want to hear about it anymore. I guess she is right. Nothing seems to move forward and nothing changes.
Thoughts and Prayers
4 weeks ago
